KAILAN BA DARATING YUNG PANAHON NA KAILANGAN KO NA TUMIGIL SA PAGLIMOS NG ATTENTION NG MGA TAONG MAHAL KO?

its been 1 month august 15 yun nakipagbreak ako kasi nalaman ko na may date nanaman sila ni girl sa uaap. suko na ko! ayoko na. ayoko na masaktan. ayoko na umasa. ayoko na makipaglokohan sa kanya. hindi naman xa gumagawa ng paraan para magkabalikan kami ee. sinasabi nya mahal nya ko. nararamdaman q lng pg nkkita qng nluluha na xa. pero i'm tired of this drama. i mean, wala na bang iba? lagi na lang bang ganito? bakit kasi hindi mo pa kayang tigilan si girl e! kung ako yung mahal mo then STAY AWAY FROM HER! kung ako yung gus2 mo makasama forever then don't be so makasarili. nung bday ng friend nmn. sinasabi ng mga friend nya na gus2 nya daw mkpgbalikan. tabi xa ng tabi sakin pero WALA NAMAN XA SINASABI. sabi nga sa accounting principle. DON'T ASSUME OTHERWISE STATED! so hndi ako dpat mniwala na babalik xa dahil wala nmn xa sinasabi sakin. hndi ako dapat mgpakaaggressive. hndi ako ang dapat humabol! girl! ako nga yung nangiwan para magbago xa diba tapos ako pa ba yung magkukusa na mgkabalikan kami! duh!? mxado nmn yta ako obssessed pag ganun. kanina pinanood ko si girl sa laban nya sa table tennis well honestly wala naman talaga ako balak puntahan xa e. pero nagpromise ako so tinupad ko. para makita nya na wala akong galit sa kanya. para malaman nya na hndi na ko bitter sa knya. at para na rin suportahan sya since friend ko nmn tlga xa. tapos at 10 30 nung tapos na math class q nagtxt si lalaki. sabi he wants to see me. kain dw kmi sa mcdo. aq nmn si gaga nagpakahead over heels dahil sobrang miss xa so pinapunta q sya sa lower lanai. nung una ayaw pa nya pero napilit ko din. kumain kami sa mcdo at gago kinuha yung fliers na humihingi ng solicitation at ibinigay sakin. sabi pa "music oh" so napasubo na ko kaya binigyan ko ng 20 pesos. tpos nung narealize nya na solicitation yun sabi ba naman sakin "bakit mo binigyan". ampoooooootttttaaaaahhhh! kainis talga super! so kumain kami. alis xa ng alis sa upuan. so nabored ako kaya nanood aq ng movie na hndi nya trip. tpos npansin q txt na lng xa ng txt. baddddtrrriippP! kala ko pa naman makikipagbalikan na si gago! pero hndi e. wala kami npagusapan! knmusta ko, okay lng dw xa tpos yun lang ang napagusapan nmin at tinitingnan nya yung time nya at sinasabi sakin 11:45 na. so ano ibig sabihin nun?! e d gus2 n nya q umalis! lecccchhhhe!!!!!! so nagkusa n q. niligpit ko na ang netbook ko. tinanggal nya ang charger. nilagay q ng mabilis sa bag sabay sabi ko alis na tayo! pag labas namin ng mcdo sabi ayun sabay kana sa classm8s mo. so pikon na talaga ako at iniwan ko na xa dun. umuwi xa magisa nya. pero di ko alam kung umuwi na sya or pinuntahan si girl sa admu (kaya lng nmn sya napadpad ng katips para panoorin laban ni girl ee. palusot pa xa !) so ako ngayon ay naiiyak. nasasaktan but i'm pretending that nothing is wrong. i'm pretending na okay aq na break n kmi. i'm pretending na we can be friends. i'm smiling thought the pain is unbearable. i'm trying to hide the pain kasi wala nmn makakaintindi e. nakachat q ang soul sis ko from california. sobrang nagburst out of tears ako. binuhos q lhat and she gave advices. i felt better so now i know that i should prioritize my studies and not him. i should know better now. makasarili xa. super! so pag hndi xa nagbago at hndi nagtananda! fuck xa. magdusa xa di ko na sya babalikan kah8 lumuha pa sya ng dugo! amp. amp. ampooooottttaaaaahhhh talaga! super sinasaktan ko lng sarili ko. dpat talaga hndi n q mkpgkita s knya. at wg n dn communication. pero nirewardan ako ng globe ng unli e. so after ng unli na to! goodbye na sa knya! hndi ako magkukusa. xa magkusa! kung mahal nya q iovercome nya katorpehan nya!

okay so nalayo nga aq sa B.I friends napasubo naman aq sa Backstabber friends. haaay! buti n lng ngkakilala kmi ni G&C feeling q super comfortable aq sa kanila. nashashare q mga gus2 q sbihin at super open kmi sa isatisa. well, d n q mgtataka kung magalita backstabber friends q kc mali nga nmn tlga yung ginawa q pag iwan ng bigla sa kanila. pero its not my fault na mas pinili q c G&C kasi sobrang OP aq pg ksma q backstabber friends q. sobrang kailangan makisama sa mga trip nila gawin, trip puntahan at trip pag usapan. magalit man sila okay lang hindi q nmn sila masisisi pero kung totoo talaga silang friend sakin, iintindihin nila kung bakit mas pinili qng hindi sumama sa kanila at maiintindihan nila. yung pinakaBackstabber sa kanil ang hindi q yta tlga mkksundo sa buong buhay q. alam mo yun kah8 gano aq makisama at kh8 gano kdming goodness ipakita q npka BRAT and SUPER MEAN nya sakin! hay nako! kakarmahin din xa noh! amff.

lovelife naman?
hayy. may bago n nmn nalilink ky bf q. at classm8 p nya. d q 2loy mbbantayan kilos nya. kya fs n lng at ym ang babantayan q pra d xa malandi sa fs at ym nung bruha n yun. kso sa cellphone thing wla n q magagawa kundi magdasal at umasa na wag muling lumandi ang boyfriend q!

sa relationship nmn namin parang nauunder n nmn nya q, dpat control muna aq! kung d xa mgttxt e d hndi dn aq mgttxt! qng d xa mgcomment dpat d rn aq mgcomment at qng wla xa balak magparamdam dpat d q habuin! sumosobra n xa ah! sobrang hinabol q n xa dati! talagang secret blogging n lng ang bestfriend q ngaun at taguan ng secrets and feelings. kasi pag naikwen2 q sa iba pwede magspill tska di aq nakasisiguro na maiintindihan aq ng pagkakatiwalaan q bka siraan lng aq kya buti n lng may blogspot! tnx BLOGGER.COM! iloveyou!

"It is only with the heart that one can see rightly, what is essential is invisible to the eye"

the most perfect birthday i have experienced so far :]
i am sick these past few days but i am able to go to school this day so i surprised my blockmate buddies :] they are really shocked that i am present though they know that i am sick. luckily, the profs for english and pe was in quarantine so our only class for that day was math. i was grateful that i went to school because we had this 40 item quiz in algebra. they planed to go to gateway but i have no enough money so i told them that i can't go. some of us went home, some went to campus and i went to mcdo with 4 of my blockmate buddies. those who are in campus went in mcdo then we decided to go to a nearer place--- robinsons place metro east :] we roam around the mall, we make tambay on some parts of robinsons place. there are few weird things happening but i did not mind it. (in my surprise, those weird things are my blockmates preparation for a special card that they gave me on the next day.) after roaming around the mall we grew tired so we decided to went home but the rain was really hard so we sat on mcdo seats. i text my love to go and see me on my birthday. he went without hesitation in mcdo so i introduce him to my blockmate buddies. he gave me fruits so i will be healthy and a card (blue symbolizes truth and loyalty. that was really nice.. the color of the bday card was metallic blue--love it!) then we decided to separate paths with my blockmates. i treat him to kfc. because of the hard rain or maybe a typhoon. there was a brown out happened on the mall. but i did not mind it because i am happy with the one i love even though the mall feels like its in a disaster. the electricity was saved by the generator so we continue to eat at kfc. after that we search for a thing that we can both have. we bought a cellphone chain at BENCH it is color blue and its colors are like the UK flag then we went home (the typhoon stops after we eat, i didnt saw my blockmates maybe they went home when the rain stops).. he accompany me at home then we surf the net, do homework things, have some little chat and small talks.. her older sister greets me happy birthday. then her mom called him asking where is he. he told that it is my birthday so he is at my house. he went home at 7:30pm still wearing his college uniform :] my mom arrived then she has a lasagna for us :] it costs 800 but it is more unique to be my 16th birthday cake, but that time i want a chocolate cake. haha XD then we take pictures and so the day ends.. i thank the Lord for that day then i sleep soundly hoping that tomorrow and the other comming days will be just as happy and as lucky as that day :]

this is really sweet of you guys :] from my new blockm8 buddies :] i was really touched. i didn't expect that they will give me a ginormous surprise like this. during my birthday we went to robinsons place we eat and there are lot of weird stuffs like an elevator phobia, and gossips but they won't join me to their conversations and i found out that those are just excuses so they can write one by one on this card without me knowing it :] i am really happy because i felt really appreciated. they are good guys :] love them all. love us TEN! we have lots of differences but i think those differrences will make us really strong and be bonded because opposite attracts right? :]

nilayuan q n ung mga naging friends ko nung first day dhil nttkot aq n maipluwensyahan nila aq. kya e2 happy aq sa new friends q. ung lgi qng ksma is a muslim pero di sya nagsusuot ng abaya. she's pretty kmukha nya c hermione granger and npkgnda din ng kalooban. mejo bitter sya sa love dhil no choice nmn xa kundi iarrange marriage kya pra s knya wla dn kwnta kh8 mainluv xa. mkulit xa at npkmkwn2. bsta yun ang sya nya ksma. nag eenjoy din aq sa mga subjects q pati sa profs.. mbbait cla lhat. i love the eng prof, math prof. bsta nppncn nla aq. im happy kasi nagging center of attraction n dn aq ng smhan nmin. ayun. sya. sna mgpa2loy 2. thnk you

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i am: your BLESSING..
status: single littlemissblogger now signing off ♥
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